Giving Up. Maybe.

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Giving Up. Maybe.

Postby Karen » Fri May 25, 2012 10:30 am

After years of job searching (for a time I had part time employment) I was hired to stay with a lady who suffered from dementia. It would only be a couple of days a week, but it was a start towards earning my own keep.

I worked one day and was told not to come back. The lady couldn't cope with a new person thrust into her set routine.

It didn't matter, I'd gotten an interview for a nearly-perfect office job. After the interview I sent a follow-up thank you letter, I prayed, I hoped -- I wasn't hired.

This morning I didn't want to get out of bed. That's it, I'm done trying, done hoping. I'm scared and worn out. I'll stay locked in my rented room...sort of like the apostles right before Pentecost. And Pentecost is two days away.

So I'm up and dressed, back at the library looking for work. And Pentecost is on Sunday. On that day I'll wear red, and go to church. Perhaps the burning candles will remind me of tongues of fire. Perhaps the open windows will let in a strong wind.

I probably won't gain great courage to boldly proclaim my faith to hecklers. But maybe I'll gain enough strength to get up in the morning in order to try, to hope, and to pray -- for one more day. And then one more day after that.

Come Holy Spirit, teach me to pray.
"Remember that you are the guardians of beauty in the world."
Pope Paul VI - Message to Artists
Karen
 
Posts: 196
Joined: Wed Oct 15, 2008 8:27 am
Location: Cochranton, Pennsylvania

Re: Giving Up. Maybe.

Postby Maire » Fri May 25, 2012 2:24 pm

“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest." ~ Matthew 11:28

Dear Karen,
Our Lord has a plan for you and will sustain you.
I know you are very tired right now and it is difficult when there is not an answer in sight. This rough patch is temporary. Even though the two job situations did not materialize, it was not a reflection on you personally. You have much to offer.

In his program on EWTN, Fr. Groeschel has answered phone calls from people who feel overwhelmed /immobilized from life events that are depressing. Fr. Benedict is a psychologist and counselor; there are two pieces of advice he always seems to give:

1. As soon as you wake up in the morning, jump out of bed and start your activity. (In your case, work on making a rosary.) Don't stay there motionless just thinking about everything.

2. Find a volunteer opportunity where you will be helping someone else. Maybe one afternoon a week your local hospital might have an opening for someone to go from room to room offering patients a drink of water, someone to smile at them and talk with them for a minute or two. Many of them are feeling frightened and helpless.

Whatever you do, I think it is important not to isolate yourself.
Prolonged emotional stress can be exhausting. Try to get more rest. Little naps may help, but then JUMP out of bed.
Please take good care of yourself.

You are remembered in my prayers.
God bless you.

Mary
LORD, let Your mercy be on us, as we place our trust in You. ~ Psalm 33:22

Knotted Cord Rosary for Troops and for Veterans:
http://www.seatofwisdom.net/rosary.htm
http://www.seatofwisdom.net/veterans.htm
Maire
 
Posts: 320
Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 3:51 pm
Location: New England

Re: Giving Up. Maybe.

Postby Karen » Tue May 29, 2012 10:35 am

Dear Mary,

I've been thinking about what you wrote, and then realized it might seem rude if I didn't write to let you know I appreciated you taking the time to give such good advice.

There is little chance of me actually staying inside my apartment all the time, for I don't have internet at home, nor do I subscribe to a newspaper. In order to "earn" the privilege of collecting unemployment compensation I must apply for at least three jobs a week, so most days I take my laptop to the local small-town library, read newspaper want ads, and use the library's WiFi to look for work.

Most weeks it is hard to find enough jobs to apply for, so I'm always worrying about meeting my "quota". Plus I'm tired of spending so many hours at the library, which is quite a noisy, "gossipy" place.

I will take your advice on doing volunteer work, and try to stop worrying about spending gas money to do it. (As you can see, I have a hard time following Jesus' command not to worry.) I am currently a volunteer at a museum 11 miles from my home, and one Saturday a month I go there to enter data into a research library computer (among other tasks). This is a quiet library, and I believe I will start going in once a week to a) work on a needed task, b) be able to put on my resume cover letters that I enter data on a weekly basis, and c) be able to attend either Tuesday or Thursday 5:15 p.m. daily Mass at St. Mary of Grace R.C. Church. (The other daily Masses are in the early morning.)

I can still go to the "noisy" public library in the morning for a quick job hunt, and then go to the "quiet" research library and act like an intelligent person with plenty of job skills.

Thank you for caring about me. I once saw a TV show where a young child was talking about something frightening him. He told his Mom that he knew God was always with him, but he also needs to be around "people with skin". I thought that was a cute way to differentiate between the spiritual world, and flesh-and-blood friends. I pray and tell God my troubles, and I thank my guardian angel and the saints for praying for me. But it's nice to have "someone with skin" say kind words of encouragement.
"Remember that you are the guardians of beauty in the world."
Pope Paul VI - Message to Artists
Karen
 
Posts: 196
Joined: Wed Oct 15, 2008 8:27 am
Location: Cochranton, Pennsylvania

Re: Giving Up. Maybe.

Postby Maire » Wed May 30, 2012 8:57 am

Dear Karen,

Thanks for your thoughtful answer. I know you to be a very considerate person and would not have thought any less if you did not respond. But I would have kept wondering how you are and would have been anxious for an update.

Yes, Fr. Benedict always gives great, practical advice. I'm happy to be able to remember his words and pass them on.

Once when I was between jobs I volunteered to do clerical work at our local hospital, filing papers and such. It boosted my morale to be around other people at a time when I was feeling a bit unsure and vulnerable; the staff members were always kind to me and they were very happy to have an extra helper.

Your volunteer work at the museum sounds great.
Yes, what a wonderful opportunity to attend afternoon Mass during the week!

Your local church might be another place to volunteer some time. At our parish there is always a need for more people to help stuff envelopes for mailings, place inserts in bulletins, record donations, etc.. Usually these tasks are done by a small group of dedicated helpers... generous, supportive folks like yourself.

We will continue to remember you in prayers.

God bless you.

Mary
LORD, let Your mercy be on us, as we place our trust in You. ~ Psalm 33:22

Knotted Cord Rosary for Troops and for Veterans:
http://www.seatofwisdom.net/rosary.htm
http://www.seatofwisdom.net/veterans.htm
Maire
 
Posts: 320
Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 3:51 pm
Location: New England


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